Monday, January 4, 2010
I decided, about 20 years ago, to play on my church ladies softball team. I don't really like softball, but I would give it one last chance. I don't remember the reasons behind that decision, but I hated the first practice, spending it getting corrected repeatedly by teammates. I never went back; leaving in tears was not a positive outcome for me.
Mom said they were trying to help, but how is public humiliation supposed to help? Not one woman came to me and quietly offered private practice sessions to teach me how to do it. They were probably relieved that such a poor player did not return. Was the game more important than the individual, even to these good women?
Was softball a bad decision for me? Or was it a good decision, to firm up my decision not to waste my time on sports?
Recently my eye doctor confirmed that a minor astigmatism creates poor depth perception for me. Not enough to keep me from driving and seeing large objects, but definitely enough to make a speeding tennis ball or softball turn invisible to me. I did okay at volleyball, kickball, and dodgeball, because the ball is big. I also loved soccer, and maybe that's why I totally enjoyed crab soccer, with its giant ball.
All that time, it was not that I was klutzy and non-athletic, it was a vision problem! I wonder what else in my life I lack the vision to see? What is right in front of me, but I just can't see it due to lack of faith, lack of insight, selfishness or stubbornness? What kind of experience will it take to open my eyes to other things I need to know?